The career of a composer can be lonely. What to do?
Are you comfortable alone? Do you enjoy silence? Many professors and artists encourage people to spend time by themselves to find their voice. But when we spend too much time by ourselves, writing music every day, it can get pretty lonely.
When I discovered I had a hard time being by myself, I froze and even felt uncomfortable. I wrote music with the TV on, or not write at all, just to avoid the silence.
I always joke that the only shame about my daily job is that I cannot listen to music while I create music (ha!). You know what I mean.
In a more serious tone, I had to push myself through not wanting to be alone or spent time in silence to write my piece.
Is it just me who feels lonely?
Is there someone else out there who is not happy with the “writing alone” idea? I would love to discuss this in an email or call.
I don’t think it is only me because even someone as famous as Stephen King mentions in his book On Writing that the career of a writer can be very lonely. That gave me some peace. At least he is acknowledging that.
It takes time to learn to be alone
I’ve had to learn it the hard way. Or maybe it is just hard for me. Practicing and failing, sometimes winning and spending a great time. It all takes time.
On the other hand, I am grateful to be able to spend time by myself and be freer in my desk, writing the shitty first draft (as Bird By Bird book recommends) and singing my music out loud.
It is all about finding balance
As much as I learned to love myself and enjoyed my time alone, I also realized I needed to have some kind of contact with others. Most importantly, I discovered that I process things by talking.
As much as I love talking to my desk, I need to reach other humans!
After working by myself for six hours, I come a little strong to people, but I hope this post explains the reason why this happens! I keep reminding myself that it is all about balance and that I am happier when I get a little of both worlds.
The good news is that once you connect with a choir, you get to work with amazing people and then you get to party with them, but that will be for another post.
For now, do you struggle with being alone? Reach out to someone! Send me a message and let’s talk 🙂
